Phantasmal Forces


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Released Feb 24, 2019
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ASTROMETRICS "Phantasmal Forces" (2019)

Irene Prix: Guitar & Vocals
Teemu Tuovinen: Keyboards
Kalle Alho: Bass
Joonas Laine: Drums

Music & lyrics: Joonas Laine
All arrangements by Astrometrics

This album is licensed for non-commercial use with attribution (CC BY-NC 3.0). Please use the following attribution:

Astrometrics: [Song name] (

Mixing: Joonas Laine
Mastering: Jaakko Viitalähde

Cover Layout: Joonas Laine
Cover Elements: Kukka (Credit: Joonas Laine)

Cover font:
Fyodor. Designed by Chris Hughes. SIL Open Font License.


Gandalf was a Fifth Level Magic User

Fireballs, lightning bolts, phantasmal force
and even easier tricks than those
The selection of spells he sports shows clearly
just how far his ability goes

We conclude: there is no proof whatsoever that the
famous Gandalf was capable
of anything that would go beyond the starting levels
of a dabbling mage

Gandalf the Gray
was only a fifth level magic user
He couldn't save even his own arse
what a loser!

If this sounds preposterous then just check yourself
the sources, it's plain to see
Every spell he ever cast — his reputation's bloated

And Sauron himself, by the way, was not as powerful
as he, too, is made out to be
He was only eighth or seventh level magic user
seems clear to me

Based on the facts!
I just looked up the sources
Have a look at the facts!
Just take a look at the sources

I Dream of a Genie in a Light Brown Box

I have seen the genie
on a bright blue screen
others I know
say the light is green

Yet others I know
assert the screen is white
but we all have something
that will make things alright

I dream of a, I dream of a
genie in a light brown box

My friends told me about it
I saw it on TV
I begged my parents that they
purchase one for me

I will love my genie
I will love my genie
when we're both sixty-four

I dream of a, I dream of a
genie in a light brown box